A woman should fall in love with herself over and over again. 

Sometimes I need reminders and other times I need to allow myself grace. Self love is not some divine destination, it’s a daily practice.

I wish I could say that I’m always feeling myself, embracing my beauty, or not second guessing myself but I’m not. The truth is I’m a hot mess at times! Of course I mean that in the best way possible. However, what I am saying is my life isn’t perfect and I wouldn't have it any other way. Because of my so called imperfections, I understand the vastness of my love. I respect my journey and the need to be free within. I recognize that without falling, I wouldn't be grateful for getting back up. I am grateful and because of that my relationship with God has deepened and the vision for my life has grown. For me self love has always been a collective process. Through the support of therapist, friends, mentors, spiritual practice, and self reflection, I've learned to shift my relationship with myself through challenging my interpretation. It's not that my fear or insecurities go away but the way I relate to it is different.

When I catch myself feeling unworthy which totally still happens, I sit with the discomfort and breathe though it. Its a practice that involves intentionality and patience. Every day isn't the same and I don't believe self love is an enlightened place folks with hella knowledge arrive to. Regardless of the books you read, the healers you work with or not, or how many hours you sit in deep meditation/prayer or nah, we are ALL healers and we ALL have access to self love. I believe if you're breathing and living your life, you love yourself! As my love coach Angelisa Almanzar states, "You want to take love from being in a place of theory now to a place of action."

Below are some actions steps I've taken to pour into myself and honor the love that is within. 

1. Spirituality: Spirituality has always been a grounding force for me. Centering it on my relationship with God. I've explored religions such as Buddhism, Christianity, and Ancient spirituality and what has been a grounding force for me is my own personal relationship with God. I have recently come back to Christianity although I respect other traditions and paths, Christianity is a grounding practice for me.  

2. Journaling: Spending time with myself reflecting is everything. When I was in my teens up until mid-twenties, I journaled for at least an hour a day. Many times I spent reflecting on my life, the challenges, and my vision for the future.

3. Community: Aside from my immediate family, most of my relationships are with my chosen family and that has been a truly grounding force in my life. Given the environment I was surrounded by, I made it my business to surround myself with people that were life affirming. 

4. Music: Music has always been a grounding force in my life. Whether it's gospel, gangsta rap, or Donny Hathaway, I have also found my peace and story in music. Through sharing my poetry and song, I am able to tap into my gifts with the hopes of inspiring others to do the same. 

5. Movement: Physicality is a huge part of cleansing and release. I absolutely love getting physical and in tuned with my body. When I am moving I am releasing all things that no longer serve me. 

6. Talk Therapy: Listen I does this! And old therapist said to me "Just as you treat your body if you have a sore, you must also treat your mind." Therapy is a treatment of the mind. It's also a moment to reflect on patterns and ones relationship to self and the world. 

Aight so that's just a few things that I do and continue to do. It's a journey for me and not a destination as they say. Please feel free to share what you do. It's super inspiring. Let's continue to love ourselves over and over again. 

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” RUMI